Thin Line Between Stupid and Clever

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Archive for the category “Television”

So I’ve Finished Every Episode of Battlestar Galactica…

Two nights ago I finally finished my long quest to finish the complete series of Battlestar Galactica. That’s right, I spent several hours over many months watching a show many people know about solely through the above clip. This is a show in which machines attack humans and basically destroy the entire human race minus 40,000 or so survivors. These survivors go off looking for this place called “Earth” (heard of it?), while the cylons simultaneously chase them and look for the same “Earth.” Four seasons later, this happens:

Ha! Just kidding. I’m not going to tell you what happens at the end, because Read more…

News Flash! Americans Still Dumb

Americans are idiots.  Not just a few Americans, but a significant majority of them are embarrassing morons.  We have long had anecdotal evidence of this through the Birthers, Truthers, and Sarah Palin supporters, but today brings further proof.  From Newsweek:

When NEWSWEEK recently asked 1,000 U.S. citizens to take America’s official citizenship test, 29 percent couldn’t name the vice president. Seventy-three percent couldn’t correctly say why we fought the Cold War. Forty-four percent were unable to define the Bill of Rights. And 6 percent couldn’t even circle Independence Day on a calendar.

Six percent of American citizens could not circle Independence Day on a calendar.  If you extrapolate the survey results out to the full United States population, that is 18.48 million people who either do not know that July 4th is Independence Day or are entirely unable to read and process a calendar.  Hey, but at least we now know who’s been watching Two and Half Men all of these years.

Solid Read on Jon Stewart

Definitely recommended.  Favorite quote:

The thing that shocked me the most when I first met reporters was the people who would step aside and say, ‘Boy, I wish I could say what you’re saying.’ You have a show! You are a network anchor! Whaddya mean you can’t say it?” Stewart says. “It’s one reason I admire Fox. They’re great broadcasters. Everything is pointed, purposeful. You follow story lines, you fall in love with characters: ‘Oh, that’s the woman who’s very afraid of Black Panthers! I can’t wait to see what happens next. Oh, look, it’s the ex-alcoholic man who believes that Woodrow Wilson continues to wreak havoc on this country! This is exciting!’ Even the Fox morning show, the way they’re able to present propaganda as though it’s merely innocent thoughts occurring to them: ‘What is this “czar”? I’m Googling, and you know what’s interesting about a czar? It’s a Russian oligarch! Don’t you think it’s weird that Obama has Russian oligarchs, and he’s a socialist?’ Whereas MSNBC will trace the word and say, ‘If you don’t understand that, you’re an idiot!’ The mistake they make is that somehow facts are more important than feelings.”

The Sad History of MTV

Oh, how things change.  One minute you’re reporting on the cutting edge of the music, art, culture, politics, and values of America’s youth; the next, you’re a corporate sellout who merely exists to hawk cell phones, promote terrible movies, and deify talentless, pompous pop stars (Sorry for the cheap alliteration, but I couldn’t resist).  I’m speaking of course of the once proud MTV.  For those of you born after 1985, MTV actually stands for Music Television.  Now, as we all know, MTV is currently devoid of any musical content, but not so long ago, it used to play music – lots and lots of music, actually. In fact, MTV was once even relevant.   Read more…

Why You Should Watch the World Cup

Okay, what I’m about to attempt is probably pretty foolish, but that won’t stop me from trying  to convince you to watch the World Cup this summer.  Now let me be clear, I am not a really soccer (futbol) fan, nor do I have any real knowledge of the sport.  Although I have a tremendous amount of respect for soccer and the athletes who play it, soccer has never really been my thing.  Like most Americans, I’m much more comfortable with baseball, basketball, and/or football.  Despite my indifference towards soccer, I think the World Cup is probably the coolest thing in all of sports, and that’s why you should watch it. Read more…

120+ Hours of “Lost”: Why do we do this to ourselves?

Yes, I subjected myself to several hours of this

Last night, the series finale of Lost aired concluding 6 seasons and over 120 hours of episodes.  If you’re looking for a review of the finale or of Lost in general, then you are in the wrong place.  This is not a post about my feelings on the finale, but rather my realization that I had spent over 5 entire days watching a television show that was ultimately unsatisfying.   This is not the first time I’ve had this same feeling.  I watched all 86 hours of  the Sopranos only to be left with a blank black screen and a feeling of “wtf just happened.”  Hell I watched 2 1/2 seasons of Nip/Tuck before my sense of shame and “The Carver” forced me to move on.  Come to think about it, The Wire (greatest television show ever and this is not debatable) is the only show that comes to mind that didn’t leave me with an odd feeling of regret after the finale.

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Wake Up Call-May 24, 2010

[via Huffington Post]

I’ll Never Care About Man vs. Food

I must admit that I loathe about 98% of the programs on television:  Entertainment Tonight, The Hills, E! News, Grey’s Anatomy, just about anything on Vh1; I could go on forever.  (I also pretty much hate anyone who regularly watches that garbage.)  There are plenty of shitty shows to despise, but I honestly think the dumbest show on television is Man vs. Food, on the Travel Channel.  
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The Case for Lonesome Dove

This isn’t a movie review.  There are plenty of those out there.  This is me trying to convince you to spend six hours in the next week, or month, watching one of the greatest, most epic, movies of all time.  And before you say, it’s too long and it’s a western…  lemme tell ya, it’s not a western in the John Wayne or Clint Eastwood tradition, and by the time you finish it, you may find yourself wanting more.

Augustus "Gus" McCrae and the Captain, Woodrow F. Call

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Comedy finally returns to Comedy Central

Thank you, Daniel Tosh.

You are by far the funniest clip show host on TV today. (Actually, by removing Letterman, Ferguson and Colbert from the equation, there is no comparison as to who the funniest host of ANY kind is on television.)  I mean, who else has the artistic freedom, not to mention the stones, to say things on television like “hair diaper”? (On a recent episode Tosh said it when referring to a photo of Demi Moore and her pubes, which, if you go to Tosh.0’s Web site to find the pic he’s talking about, it takes you to a video of him telling you precisely how to seek out the traumatizing pic.) Read more…

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